Other Common Problems For Those Who Experience PTSD

Unfortunately there are other problems that come with PTSD. http://www.ptsd.va.gov/public/pages/fslist-other_common_problems.asp I have discussed some of them in earlier posts. PTSD is compounded by these other issues. I have had to pay attention to anniversaries of things that were traumatic. For years during my childhood and marriage to the children's father I dreaded holidays. Christmas and Easter in particular. My therapist and the children's therapists taught me that creating new traditions around holidays is a good way to take the focus of the previous trauma.This has worked well for me and the children. That doesn't mean that at times old stressors don't pop up it means we have learned to deal with them.

I have been pretty indifferent to mother's day in particular, and have never gotten upset when/if my children didn't make a big fuss. Every mother's day growing up with Ruth was pure unadulterated hell. There was nothing I, nor my siblings could do that could possibly make her feel good on mother's day. We tried very hard though. It always ended up with her having some type of fit, breaking things, screaming, yelling and threatening to kill herself. Which I now know is a common coping skill used by adults who experience intense trauma in their childhood, especially sexual abuse. I have come to realize that mother's day for Ruth growing up may have been traumatic and she may have been responding to that. It was harder for me to do things for her when I moved out of her  house. As I came to grips with my childhood I wrestled with mother's day cards. Buying one would cause me great stress. I would have panic attacks around them. I would read them and they talked of a loving mother who, nurtured and cared for her children. Who had gone above and beyond for her children. I just couldn't buy one that said any of those things. I tried to buy a generic type of card and she would get furious that it was a generic card that didn't talk of how wonderful of a mother she was. When I made the decision to stop talking to Ruth for my sanity my indifference toward mother's day continued. I never made it a big deal. I wanted so much not to be like Ruth that I chose to not set myself up for what she did every year. I regret it some now as I watch my daughter being the wonderful mother she is. She is treating mother's day like I did when she was growing up. She isn't bothered if she doesn't get a card or gift. I wonder if somehow I have cheated her out of allowing herself a day a year to bask in the reality she is a wonderful mother. And to allow others to do things for her. I'm apparently experience some survivors guilt today.

Sometimes I learn more about myself when I am doing a blog post. I didn't even intend on writing about mother's day. Writing about PTSD and the complex issues that come up around it brings me to places I haven't entered in a long time. I have tried to live my life by not attaching some type of "condition" on anything that I did for my children. This is not to say that I never did because I would be lying. Ruth would always have some ulterior motive to giving or doing things for her children. She never failed to remind my siblings and I when she had done something for us and why we owed her something for that. To me that was manipulative, conditional love. I wanted to give my children unconditional love and didn't want to put "conditions" on anything I did for them. I realized this past father's day how I am still effected by purchasing cards for father for father's day. I am grateful that I am aware of this. I continue to learn new things about myself daily. I am glad my PTSD is under control and I have the life I do. I am blessed, Rosie

Other Common Problems.

PTSD is just one of the effects of trauma. People experience a range of reactions following a traumatic event. Below learn more about other common problems and reactions related to experiencing trauma. For Veterans, also see the VA Mental Health website.

• Acute Stress Disorder
  Discusses ASD, including who is at risk, how is it treated, and how is it related to PTSD.
• Anger and Trauma
  Describes the relationship between trauma and anger and provides treatment strategies for the three manifestations of anger.
• Reminders of Trauma: Anniversaries
  On the anniversary of traumatic events, some people may find that they experience an increase in distressing memories of the event.
• Avoidance
  Explains emotional and behavioral avoidance and how avoidant coping can get in the way of healing from trauma.
• Chronic Pain and PTSD: A Guide for Patients
  Learn more about chronic pain, how doctors evaluate it, and how is may be related to trauma and PTSD.
• Common Reactions After Trauma
  Following exposure to a trauma most people experience stress reactions. Here is a description of the types of common symptoms that can occur. Common problems are also addressed.
• Depression, Trauma and PTSD
  Explains what depression is, how it is treated, and what you can do about it.
• Nightmares and PTSD
  Explains what nightmares are, how common they are, how they are related to PTSD, and what effective treatments exist.
• PTSD and Problems with Alcohol Use
  The impact of PTSD on alcohol use and dependence.
• PTSD and Substance Abuse in Veterans
  Explains how PTSD is related to Substance Use Disorder (SUD) in Veterans. Treatment options are presented.
• Self-Harm
  What is self-harm, how common is it, who engages in self-harm and why, and treatments for self-harming behavior.
• Sleep and PTSD
  Learn why people with PTSD may have trouble sleeping and what they can do about it.
• Suicide and PTSD
  Learn about the relationship between trauma, PTSD, and suicide.
• Traumatic Brain Injury and PTSD
  Discusses TBI, its relationship to PTSD, ways to cope, and TBI in Veterans.